Blog4new - 3 Tips for mothers trying to cope with a son or daughter’s addiction

3 Tips for mothers trying to cope with a son or daughter’s addiction

The heartbreak of a child dealing with addiction

When you become a parent no matter how prepared you may think you are, there is no actual handbook that guides you through the ups, downs, joys, heartaches and bumps along the way.  There are the general guidelines that are just the basic facts of life as each child is unique!

Trying to figure out what went wrong

When your child turns 18 they are basically a young adult and start to steer their lives in the direction they want it to go.  As a parent, you reluctantly let go of the reins hoping beyond hope that they will be okay.  And when something goes wrong the first reaction as a parent is one that you somehow failed them somewhere along the way.  You start harboring guilt and maybe even shame thinking that if only you had done something differently and the big what if and if only factors start to plague you.  Some parents react in anger and go on the defensive.

The truth of the matter Once your child is grown there are no parental do-overs, there is no point in beating yourself up over things you think you may or may not have been able to do better.And really there is no such thing as a perfect parent!

mom - 3 Tips for mothers trying to cope with a son or daughter’s addiction

Once a child reaches adulthood you as a parent are no longer responsible for their life choices just as your parents were not responsible for yours.  And as an adult where are responsible for our very own life choices and as an adult do know the differences between right and wrong!

Here are 3 tips for coping with a son or daughter who is an addict:

#1           Love them – without prejudice or consequence show them how much you love them.  But don’t indulge them they must realize there are consequences to their actions.

#2           Help them find the help and support they need – instead of trying to bail them out of difficult situations or aiding them with the financial help of which you cannot be certain of how it is being spent.  Rather offer to assist them in finding the help and support they need to recover.

#3           Don’t give up on them – no matter how difficult they get, or how much they try to deny their addiction.  Don’t give up on, it is hard and trying, many a time you will just want to give up and walk away but this is the time they need you the most even if they do not know it.

mom2 - 3 Tips for mothers trying to cope with a son or daughter’s addiction

Conclusion

A parent never wants to see their child suffer or believe that they can do things that would potentially put themselves and or others in harm way.  But there are no guarantees in life and anything can happen as a parent you have to try to keep your wits about you, stay focused on the fact that your child’s addiction is not your fault and push through as best you can!  Seek help for you and your family members to help you all navigate through the difficult times ahead.

Blog3new - The dire effects of drug abuse on children!

The dire effects of drug abuse on children!

Parents who are addicted to drugs

Kids with parents who are drug addicts, especially those under the age of 12, can experience neglect, witness and experience traumatic events and come to feel unloved and neglected.  In kids that young these effects become lasting and ingrained into their sense of self which can severely affect their development physically and emotionally.

4 devastating and lasting effects parents with drug addictions have on their kids:

It is estimated that approximately 1 in every 5 children in the USA lives with a parent who has some form of substance abuse addiction.  Making these kids much more likely than those with normal lives susceptible to the following outcomes:

#1           Higher risk of addiction

The statistic for children living with a parent or parents who abuse substances is almost four times more likely to be more vulnerable to the substance than any other person.  Therefore drawing the dire conclusion that the child will most likely end up abusing the substance themselves.  Especially children whose mothers took drugs whilst pregnant with them.

child2 - The dire effects of drug abuse on children!

#2           Educational standards are a lot lower than average

Kids with a mother who took drugs whilst pregnant stand a higher chance of having memory, learning deficits as well as disorders such as hyperactivity and various other learning disorders.

#3           Greater risk of mental health issues and disorder

A study showed that fathers who abused drugs were more likely to have kids with severe mental health disorders especially those who suffered dire abuse at the hands of that parent.  Kids with a mother who abuses substances are also at a higher risk of mental health disorders such as ODD, ADHD, depression, stress-related disorders and anxiety

child - The dire effects of drug abuse on children!

#4           Erratic behavioral and emotional problems

Kids with a parent or parents with substance abuse issues tend to have more behavioral disorders and can become very defensive, abusive and can act out rather badly when away from home.  Or they can go the other way and become withdrawn some to such an extent they try to escape reality by creating worlds of their own and can become quite adept at lying and covering up their family situation.

Conclusion

If you suspect a child is being abused on any level it is always best to contact theChild Welfare Services.  Although no one likes a busybody who sticks their nose in other people’s business, but the fact of the matter is when it comes down to protecting the life of an innocent child that is caught up in the middle of something they neither understand, asked for and is no way their fault it is better to be that busybody than landing up on the grimmer side of that coin.